The Kitchen Witch Switch Read online

  The Kitchen Witch Switch

  Dawn Montgomery

  Contents

  Foreword

  The Kitchen Witch Switch

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Epilogue

  Magic and Mayhem Universe

  About the Author

  Kitchen Witch

  Copyright © 2020 by Dawn Montgomery

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  All rights reserved.

  * * *

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  * * *

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is coincidental.

  * * *

  This book contains content that may not be suitable for young readers 17 and under.

  * * *

  The Author of this Book has been granted permission by Robyn Peterman to use the copyrighted characters and/or worlds created by Robyn Peterman in this book. All copyright protection to the original characters and/or worlds of the Magic and Mayhem series is retained by Robyn Peterman.

  Created with Vellum

  Foreword

  Blast Off with us into the Magic and Mayhem Universe!

  * * *

  I’m Robyn Peterman, the creator of the Magic and Mayhem Series and I’d like to invite you to my Magic and Mayhem Universe.

  * * *

  What is the Magic and Mayhem Universe, you may ask?

  * * *

  Well, let me explain…

  * * *

  It’s basically authorized fan fiction written by some amazing authors that I stalked and blackmailed! KIDDING! I was lucky and blessed to have some brilliant authors say yes! They have written brand new stories using my world and some of my characters. And let me tell you…the results are hilarious!

  * * *

  So here it is! Blast off with us into the hilarious Magic and Mayhem Universe. Side splitting books by fantabulous authors! Check out each and every one. You will laugh your way to a magical HEA!

  * * *

  For all the stories, go to https://magicandmayhemuniverse.com/. Grab your copy today!

  And if you would like to read the book that started all the madness, Switching Hour is FREE!

  https://robynpeterman.com/switching-hour/

  The Kitchen Witch Switch

  I eat curses for breakfast.

  No, really. I’ve been cursed more than a thousand times and here I am facing another one. My twin sister ditched out on a cursed client and he’s definitely not happy. So now I’m stuck playing twin switch in the Kitchen Witch Academy, and I can’t cook. No really, I burn water.

  The curse isn’t like anything I’ve seen before, and neither is this crazy magical world I’ve been plunged into. I’m a cubicle queen, a meeting manager in the mundane world, not a witch. I don’t even have a familiar.

  Scratch that. It looks like Baba Yaga decided I needed one to keep me out of trouble.

  I’m out of my element, but I know one thing for sure. No curse or distraction will keep me from getting back to my regular life. Well, okay, maybe one distraction. The handsome cursed client and CEO of a big deal Kitchen Witch family might play that role.

  I’ll have to use all my skills to navigate enemy territory and avoid my twin sister’s evil familiar while I’m at it. I know one thing. Once this is over, I’m due for a long vacation at a sunny beach, margaritas and brooding Kitchen Witch CEO’s welcome.

  1

  Meghan

  You ever have one of those mornings where you know nothing is going to go your way? The moment my day begins with magic, I know it's going to be a rough one. My gaze locks on the coffee mug floating in the air in front of me. I reach for it out of frustration, but it teleports over to the copy machine.

  My eyes close in frustration. “I'm busy today, Al.”

  This coffee is bitter. A too-familiar voice pops into my head. I cut my gaze toward the top of the copy machine where a white furball sniffs my drink. That's right, I'm talking to a cat, a familiar, actually. If he's here, that means nothing but trouble will follow. I know you don't like me very much, but I come in peace.

  Don’t like him? If he’s around, an object, beverage, food, or anything else near me is going to be cursed, and I don’t want to deal with that right before this meeting.

  The mug dances in front of me. Frustrated, I snatch it out of the air before anyone else notices it. Since I live my life in the regular, non-magical world, floating coffee mugs are definitely not normal.

  “What do you want?”

  Alberto Thurston the Third, or Al, was my twin sister's familiar. If he is here...I slowly glance around the room.

  “She's not here.” Al pads over to a chair and jumps on the back. He seems to contemplate digging his claws into the cloth but changes his mind when I glare at him. “She's actually not even in the country at the moment.”

  Before I can stop it, a small sigh of relief escapes my lips. I don’t have time to fix Mel’s magic troubles this morning - or ever, really. Al jumps into the air, floating in front of me like a white cloud. I ignore him to focus on what I need to get done.

  A meeting. A very normal meeting with a very non-magical boss who is looking for a reason to give me a hard time.

  “Wait? Out of the country? I thought she's attending a new witchy school.”

  “Oh, now you want to ask questions?”

  I close my eyes in irritation and turn away from him.

  “You can't ignore me forever.”

  “Watch me,” I mutter as I run copies.

  “She's going to call you, you know.” He floats closer.

  “Oh.” I take out my phone to turn it off. “Thanks for letting me know.”

  “That won't work,” he mutters as my phone magically turns itself back on, vibrating with an incoming call.

  I close my eyes when I see her face. “I'm busy, Al.”

  Al's tail flicks back and forth as he watches me with his golden eyes. “I'm supposed to make sure you answer that call.” His claws come out and he licks them delicately as he lands on the stack of papers that I just copied. I see him reach toward the copy machine with a malicious cat grin.

  “No,” I say, diving toward the copier.

  His curse ignites and I slap my hand on the machine, drawing the curse into my body as fast as possible. The lights flicker, then go back to normal.

  As the curse knots in my stomach, I grind my teeth together. “An unrepairable paper jam error code? Really?”

  I have a magical super power, well more like super torture. I can eat or absorb curses, analyze them, then, for some strange reason, become immune to them. Or in this case, I can make sure an inanimate object can’t receive the same curse twice. Not helpful to my peace of mind, and exactly why I left my family with their magic-based bias back at home.

  “How many curses can you stop before you’re too exhausted to do well in your important meeting?” His claws flash again.

  “You are an asshole.”

&nb
sp; He smirks.

  With a sigh of frustration, I answer the phone. “No.”

  “Don't say that. I need your help.” How can a voice sound so similar, yet so different, from mine?

  “No. I don’t care what trouble you’re in, we’re not playing twin switch any more.”

  “But you don't know what I'm going to ask. Please don’t say no until you hear the rest.” Her plea is a low droning whine that makes me wish I had empty hands to rub my temples.

  “I have a very important meeting. I’m hanging up now. Love you.”

  “If you hang up, I’ll tell Mom that you—”

  I end the call immediately, then mute the notifications. Turning if off is obviously impossible, but I doubt she's figured out how to magically mess with everything in the phone. Besides, what could she possibly tell mom that will make a difference? That I won't pretend to be my twin sister again? We're grown. I can't keep fixing her messes.

  Al opens his mouth and I point my phone at him.

  “Shut it. I’m not doing this. So get lost.”

  A polite cough jerks my attention to a woman standing next to my desk. She looks elegant in a dark gray pantsuit with a chic, lovely haircut that accentuates a no-nonsense attitude I can appreciate.

  I put on my polite smile and ease my phone to my side. “Hello. Can I help you?”

  “Meghan Stiles?” She grins at me as she walks toward me.

  “I am.”

  A folder appears out the air. She opens it up, tapping it for emphasis. “Twin sister of Melanie Stiles?”

  Dammit. A witch. Of course. I close my eyes, drawing in a slow, steadying breath. My eyes open as I face this new nightmare. “Is there something I can do for you?”

  “Alberto Thurston, the third, familiar of Melanie Stiles, correct?”

  He freezes next to me. Oh yeah, she’s definitely a witch. Most of the mundane world can’t see Al, so her icy stare locks him in place. The moment it moves to me, he makes a soft mew of panic.

  “Tell your witch that she owes us for our time. The Baba Yaga has gotten involved.” She cuts a sharp look at Al.

  “Right away.”

  “Where you going?” I try to snatch the cat back, but he launches out of my reach.

  “That’s my cue to leave. Good luck.” A puff of magic appears around Al while he fades away.

  “Choke on a hairball,” I toss out as Al disappears. Sometimes I wonder if all familiars are as shady as Al, or if he has to do vile things to make up for his adorable, puffball physique.

  “If you’ll follow me to the conference room?” She gestures for me to precede her and I sigh.

  “You have the wrong person. I’ve sworn off magic.”

  Her smile tightens, followed by a warning tickle of magic on my skin. “Please come to the conference room. The Baba Yaga has a very tight schedule and you’re making her wait.”

  My eyes widen. We reach the room and I realize no one else seems to be in the office.

  Mel, what did you get me into this time? The moment I enter I see a woman straight from a big-hair 80's movie. I mean really big hair, bright makeup, all attitude and rocking a smirk that sets my nerves on edge. She looks slightly familiar to me, like I’ve seen a painting or something of her somewhere. Don’t tell me this is her?

  “Have a seat.” Ms. Pantsuit sweeps the chair out with magic and I sink slowly into the cushion.

  “What can I do for you both?”

  I glance at the other woman and see that she's looking at four vintage watches on her wrist with impatience. “We don’t have much time, so let me make this simple.”

  “You sister is currently enrolled in the Culinary Academy of Art and Magic. She is—”

  “As part of the Kitchen Witch Academy curriculum. I know.”

  “Good. Since you’re aware we can cut through the bullshit. We have a limited amount of time. Your assistance is a matter of life and death.” The 80's glam gal taps her long nails on the table. Bright green power flares out at me from her, locking my throat tight, preventing even a peep from escaping.

  I freeze as I stare at her with wide eyes. This is definitely the Baba Yaga, the most powerful witch in the world. And my sister has pissed her off. Great.

  “Elise.” She stares at me while the lady in the pantsuit pushes a folder toward me.

  My hands tremble as I open the folder, terrified that I can’t speak and wondering why my body isn’t responding. Is her voice-stealing spell not a curse? Or is she so powerful I can’t do anything to stop her? With a clenched jaw, I flip through the pages to find a short contract. A contract that has my sister as the primary signer and mine as the second responsible party.

  Anger burns inside me. My mother did it again.

  “Let me summarize. Your sister is a kitchen witch with a unique ability to neutralize curses and poisons through her natural immunity. She was a lab partner to a very powerful male witch who needs her immunization capability to stay in school. The Academy is attempting to neutralize his curse. His family is an extremely important contributor to the Academy, so they want to make sure he stays alive. Your sister skipped town. You're taking her place.” The woman next to her waves a hand, releasing my voice to speak again.

  I touch my throat. “This isn’t my signature.” I point to the contract.

  “No. Your mother signed for you since you have no rights as a magical being. Your family lists you as a null, so your mother maintains the rights to your body. It’s a strange clause we weren’t aware of, but it’s the only reason we’re here talking with you instead of arresting your sister for breaching a contract with one of the most powerful families in Kitchen Witch circles.”

  My spine stiffens at the threat, realizing the Baba Yaga’s version of jail is a lot different than the regular one. It’s not surprising for people to spend decades waiting for trial or punishment.

  “Who are you people?”

  “My apologies.” She smiles at me and takes out a business card. “I'm Elise Bellamour, director of recruiting for the Culinary Academy of Art and Magic. This is Carol, but you probably know her as the Baba Yaga.”

  So she really is the Baba Yaga. I take the card from Elise with slightly trembling fingers. Anyone riding shotgun to the Baba Yaga is someone I don’t want to offend. Elise J. Bellamour, Kitchen Witch. Her director title follows behind along with some certifications and initials I don't recognize. Kitchen Witch. Oh man. “I can't go to your Academy.”

  I try to hand back the card, but she waves me off. “I can't cook at all. There are also some things I don't understand. How is being a lab partner a matter of life and death? How dangerous is this curse?”

  “You don't need to cook. You just need to prevent him from dying before we find a cure to his curse. Your sister and mother have both assured us that curses don’t affect you. If that’s true, then we can use your ability to allow experimentation for his cure.”

  “If you’re aware that I’m a magical null, I shouldn’t be involved with you and I don’t need magic in my life.”

  “Yet here we are. A person with the ability to nullify curses is, by their very nature, a magical being.” The Baba Yaga chimed in with a wave of her beautifully manicured fingernails. “Your sister put us in a predicament. From her and your mother’s behavior, it’s obvious this isn't the first time you've had to fill in for her.”

  Anger prickles down the back of my neck. Muscles along my shoulders tighten and I can feel the first bit of rage eating me from within. “I have a job here. A life. I'm not going to keep stepping in to take her place.”

  “His life depends on your help.” The Baba Yaga sighs, then a case file poofs in front of her with a flair of magic. “Listen, I’m not happy with this either, but I wouldn't come to you if it wasn't necessary to his survival. According to your file, you've had to solve fourteen similar situations for Melanie in the past few years.”

  My mind blanks. “You’ve looked at my casefile?” Wait, do I even have one? I thought only witche
s had them. Witches with familiars.

  “All witches have them. This one will go to your familiar so you can receive the assistance you need.”

  “I don’t have a familiar.”

  “We’ve given you a temporary one. You and your sister share a natural immunity to curses, so you're exactly what we need. He is cursed to die on his twenty-eighth birthday. Exactly six weeks from now. The classes he's in are designed to extract curses and build antidotes. Some of them work on defensive magic. His curse, however, is too strong for most of the research teams. It affects everyone else around him.” Elise smiles at me as though that makes it better.

  The Baba Yaga stands up and flips her big blonde hair over her shoulder. “You're a natural problem-solver who relies on her own abilities to get through difficult projects. That capability is admirable. The fact that you've had to clean up your twin sister's messes so often means you're no stranger to her magic-related problems. Your maternal family has a long history of kitchen witchery. Your great-grandmother single-handedly led the Jello mold revolution of the 1950's.”

  “What?”

  “It's true,” Elise smiles, “She was an artist, a food sculpture pioneer.”

  I sigh while rubbing the line between my brows. Hearing the stories my mother told us growing up coming out of the mouths of strangers was a surreal experience. Mom's version, of course, involves all the reasons why the thought of Jello makes her sick to her stomach. “When do I have to give you my decision?”